Financial Desires: How Core Values and Beliefs Shape Your Wants and Needs

As a financial educator and therapist, I speak to clients about their financial challenges, experiences, and family history. Combined, these factors can help clients form their own beliefs and values about money, which can dictate their financial behaviors. As you might imagine, these clients are seeking better control of their finances. They don’t understand why they cannot save, and they’re concerned they’ll never gain control. But here’s what I tell them and what I’m telling you now: You can retake control. You can save money and achieve your goals as long as you stay focused on the things that matter to you: your core values and the beliefs you hold dear.  

Core Values 

Before you make a purchase, do you consider your core values? It may sound cumbersome, but once you’ve identified your values, pursuing your financial goals and priorities becomes much easier. Values are the beliefs we hold about what’s right, wrong, and most important in life. Moreover, they inform our behavior. That’s why it’s important to identify the values you hold close to your heart.  

When a client tells me their values are family, independence, freedom, and community, I expect their spending behavior to reflect those priorities.If they’re living paycheck to paycheck because they’re constantly going out, buying the latest popular item, and running up debt, there’s a disconnect. Their spending doesn’t align with their professed values. Of course, if they have identified these values for the first time, monitoring their behavior moving forward becomes an important step in the process.  

Core Beliefs 

Your beliefs about money are a major driver of your financial behavior. Most people form their money beliefs during childhood, often through what researchers call financial socialization – learning from their parents and their experiences within the family. You may believe “Money is the root of all evil,” “I earned my money, so I am going to spend it however I want,” or “More money will make things better.” However, beliefs like these can lead to trouble. Money isn’t inherently evil; it’s simply a tool to help you build the lifestyle you desire. And while you’ve worked hard for your money and deserve to enjoy it, saving for a rainy day and resisting the urge to indulgently spend are important.    

Understanding your money beliefs is key to helping you change your financial behavior. Dr. Bradley Klontz has identified four money scripts that shape how we interact with money; money avoidance, money vigilance, money focus or worship, and money status.  

Money Avoidance: Money avoiders believe that money is bad or that they don’t deserve it. For them, money often stirs up fear, anxiety, or disgust.  

Money Focus (Worship): “More money will make things better.” Individuals who subscribe to this notion believe that an increase in income or a financial windfall will solve their problems. 

Money Status: These individuals equate money with status, conflating self-worth with net worth. 

Money Vigilance: These people may view money as a source of shame or secrecy; however, they remain mindful of and concerned about their money.  

Your beliefs about money may have been formed at a young age, but you have the power to change them. Take the time to reflect on your financial experiences, write down the emotions associated with them, and consider how your life might be different if you shifted from them. Ask yourself: Did you have joyful holiday seasons growing up? Did you watch your parents argue about money, or did they work collaboratively? How have those experiences shaped your relationship with money today?  

Financial Goal Alignment 

You’ve taken the time to reflect on your experiences, you’ve determined your beliefs about money, and you’ve identified your values, now you need to know where you are going. What are you going to do with your money? Save for a home? An elaborate vacation? Or for a life of ease in retirement when you can pay all your bills, travel, care for your loved ones, and still have some money left over? Determining your goals is essential to and aspirational for helping you change your behaviors. Without financial goals, you may not change your behavior at all.  

It is best that your goals are specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and timebound (S.M.A.R.T.). For example, “I want to save money” isn’t specific, nor is it measurable. What’s the money for? How much is enough? You don’t want to have more questions than answers for your financial goals. Here’s a way to address that: “I want to pay off $10,000 of debt in two years.” In this example, we have a specific goal; it’s measurable ($10,000), relevant, and timebound (2 years). Is it achievable? Depending on your income and expenses, it certainly can be.  

The path to wealth is a personal journey and a financial counselor can help guide you through it. Remember, money is personal and it is best spent on the things and people you care about and in alignment with your core values and goals. Reach out to a financial counselor to help you on your financial journey.  

Samuel Molina is an Accredited Financial Counselor®, Certified Financial Therapist™ Practitioner, CEO and Founder of The Academy of Financial Education, a non-profit organization dedicated to helping the community have a healthier relationship with money. Visit Samuel’s FindAnAFC profile to view his services and connect with him on LinkedIn.